My Mother's Lies - The Reason for the Delay

You may have noticed the release date of My Mother’s Lies was a little behind this time, and for that I apologise. There is good reason. Some of you may have seen through my Facebook page where I post mostly fun and often candid photos of my furred and feathered friends. Very rarely do I ever say anything negative, but once in a while even I post about tough realities that hit our household.

One of the hardest things to cope with is the death of a loved one. Never more so than when it is fast and unexpected.  Such was the case with Beau, my adorable black Labrador who was taken all too young and far too fast.

It was a tragedy beginning with Beau falling ill within hours of him having his annual booster. At the same time, Skye, my Dalmatian also fell ill after her booster and spent two weeks on and off a drip at the vets while we were on holiday. We were totally convinced that Skye at the age of thirteen with all her allergies and being epileptic, would succumb and had mentally prepared ourselves for this. Our holiday, as you can imagine isn’t even a memory. What we were assured of was that all our animals were in good hands as our daughters come and live at our house whenever we are away. Our animals are theirs, too.

On our arrival home, Skye was still very frail and needed to go back to the vets for another round of infusions.

Beau had developed a limp, and his right elbow was hot and swollen. I rushed him to the vets.

At the age of eight months, Beau had undergone two operations on his forelegs as we discovered he had elbow dysplasia. We have always been aware of the need to balance his life between being careful that he doesn’t hurt himself and living a fulfilled dog’s life. At this stage, I was concerned that whatever had made him ill had caused inflammation in that leg.

We arranged for him to have a CT scan the following Monday, but before we could get him there, he collapsed on the Friday morning. The vet believed he may have damaged his cruciate ligament. I was not convinced.

We dosed him up and Monday couldn’t come soon enough. Don’t ask why, but in order to get the CT scan done, I had a four hour round trip. Not only that, but they told me to leave him and return later that evening. It was a very long day. The vet there was incredible. By the Tuesday evening, the vet phoned me. ‘Prepare for the worst.’ Were his words. He had never known such aggressive and widespread cancer in a dog that had remained completely stoic throughout. Never once did Beau growl, or whimper.

On that Thursday, a few weeks before Christmas, our family gathered, leaving their own pets behind for a few precious hours while they spent it with Beau. We held a dinner party for him. We took an imprint of his paw. He ate whatever he wanted and was thoroughly spoiled. There were no tears. I had banned them. There would be time enough for those afterwards. That night was for him.

The following morning, I had him put to sleep while I cradled him in my arms. I opened the window to let his soul fly free.

I took his death very hard as none of my animals have ever died from anything but old age, and for the first time ever my imagination faltered, and I found I was unable to continue with this book which is why the publication was pushed back. Although it was four months late in its writing, Boldwood Books and my editor Caroline Ridding were incredibly understanding and managed to pull it back to just two months late by ramping up the editing process for me.

When you read the story, you will understand the strange connection. I had already written the first part of the book in which not only was Beau featured, but in real life my boy was diagnosed with the same rare condition as one of the main characters I was writing about. It floored me. I had studied in great detail bone cancer. I already knew so much about it when he was diagnosed. Truth is often stranger than fiction as they say…

My darling Skye made a remarkable recovery and we truly wondered at the peculiarity of it all. Was she so ill because she knew he was dying? When he was gone, was she relieved?

Speaking to a lady, a stranger I met while walking Skye, I told her about Beau, and she told me about the recent loss of her husband. I was mortified. How could I feel the loss of my dog as deeply as she felt the loss of her husband?

Her words were a comfort, and maybe a turning point.

Grief is a full bucket of water. One more drip, and it overflows. It does not matter what source that drip of water comes from.

I debated for some time whether to continue that storyline and I realized that was the stumbling block. My head told me not to, but my heart needed to continue.

So, Beau, my beautiful boy, features quite prominently in My Mother’s Lies and I have made him immortal by including him in this book.

I hope you enjoy My Mother's Lies and perhaps this insight into my world will make you look a little closer at the characters and feel the real heart that went into writing it.

Until the next time…

I hope life is kind.

Diane

https://amz.run/9lAn  UK

https://amz.run/9lAo US

She’s been lying my whole life...

As if my mum breaking her hip and being rushed to hospital isn't shocking enough for one day, now in her post-operative delirium, she's just told me I'm not her daughter. That she has never been able to have children.

The nurse reassures me that people are often confused after a trauma. But I know this woman so well and I can tell there's a grain of truth in what she says. Which begs the questions: Who am I? Where did I come from?

When I dig into the truth, I suddenly stir up a hornet's nest of secrets, lies – and possibly a crime so unfathomable – that stretches back decades.

What has my mum done?

Can I trust her?

Or has my digging put us both in peril of our lives?

But, she loves her animals...